14 Day meltdown

I wrote this soon after we had our miscarriage. Since the event, Michael and I have been doing well... but lately I have started feeling sick. I made another doctor's appointment and it sort of all came tumbling down. I took a pregnancy test today so that I could see the negative sign and be okay with it. I know that sounds wierd, but I felt like it was something that I had to do. I took the next couple of days off of work just to get it all back together... but I guess it never really gets all back together.

This night's not gonna end like we want it to.

Daddy is here hold my hand, and we are praying for you.

I know right now I can't hold you tight or kiss your face.

So baby of mine, if it's time to give up the fight.

Run as fast as you can, into His mighty hands.

The arms that love you so.

Don't stop or hesitate. I'll be with you one day.

He'll hug your tears away.

Mommy and Daddy love you so much it hurts, But since we are helpless, and there is no cure.

Run into the arms of Jesus.

You were gonna be a dancer, with a smile of gold.

So when you're there with Him, dance around the throne.

Tell Him we said hello, but we're jealous of Him.

Cause we're sitting in this hospital room, and He's holding you.

Run as fast as you can. Into His might hands. The arms that love you so.

Don't stop, no don't hesitate. I'll be with you one day.

He'll hug your tears away.

Mommy and Daddy didn't get a long time to be with you.

But we will always believe in you.

We will never know why God wanted back your smile.

Maybe you loved Him too much to leave His side.

But as tiny as you were, you still lived a big life.

Mommy and Daddy must go on now without you.

But you will always be our little angel.

So until the day comes when we are all together.

Run... run as fast as you can.